Feel Like Something’s Missing? Explore Living an Interesting Life.

As I child, I would spend Summers with my father in Lille, France. He had taken a position as a Professor of International Business at the Universitè de Lille and during his summer break we would travel around Europe in 1978 red Renault Cinque. I was far from home and the familiarity of my friends, softball practices, and sticky chewy chocolate - my favorite flavor at Baskin Robbin's Ice Cream Parlor. Amongst trips to the magnificent art at the Louvre, the narrow canals of Venice, and the magnitude of Swiss alpine villages, each summer was a mix of sadness, anger, laughter, and fun. It was a period of life that would deeply inform my understanding of the differences in cultures, lifestyles, and priorities, and laid the foundation for a life filled with immense curiosity and an awareness that adversity and adventure were bedfellows.

My experience was what researcher Shigehiro Oishi refers to as “psychologically rich,” because it was novel, unknown, and challenging; inspired complex emotions; and changed my perspective in profound ways. His new book, Life in Three Dimensions, explains how aiming for psychological richness can be central to a sense of a life well lived—and, perhaps, take us beyond the goals of finding happiness, meaning, and purpose. Psychological richness seeks change rather than stability, newness rather than familiarity, and defers reaching a goal for the richness found in the cycle of curiosity, exploring, and learning. It's highly emotive, partially intellectual, and grounded in seeking beyond our comfort or some imagined pinnacle of knowing.

Many people experience times of happiness, and being happy and having meaning in your life are worthy pursuits. But the goal of being happy can create it's own loops of judgement - why I am not happy now? this is not making me feel fulfilled; the pressure to stay or experience happiness it can detract from the having the felt sense of it. So to can the pursuit of purpose and meaning, where the need to solidify, and justify, our reason for being might overshadow the value in lessons learned and the sweetness of those soothing moments of making to the other side.

Much of what we're focused on at the YOULAB centers around these ideas of exploring what it is to be human, developing capacities to deepen awareness, adaptability, and connection. We're interested in the long game -to create a life with a full range of human emotions, an ability to see experiences as opportunities for growth and discovery, and appreciate the extraordinary experience of being human. Our work doesn't aim to solve particular problems, or attain particular goals. We're here to support you with practices, exposure, and conversations to expand your sense of identity and ease with discomfort as you experience your life more fully, more balanced, more connected, and with more joy.

Find out more about the YOULAB, join us at an event, or reach out to discuss working with Kai and the YOULAB Practitioners Collective.

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